Friday, January 06, 2006

It was a house full of jerks anyway.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Who puts the 'Wa' in Bawawecra?

Recently Nick/Wa posted this comment on our blog about the death of his live journal

" haha - i'm afraid a little piece of my heart died, crushed under the weight of the fat, buck-toothed idiocy of my house"mates". and what use is a journal for one who has been forced to become an emotional robot? "today was another bland and listless day, in which i feared to step outside my room to face the barage of accusations and insults of my erstwhile friends" would become tiresome after a while. tiresome."

it seems he now hates living in Bawawecra.

well i have to words to say to this:

MOVE THE HELL OUT YOU FAT JERK!!!!

but serious folks. have we lost our little wa. 'Bawecra' sounds damn ridiculous.

He left a chocolate egg tied to my door the other day. Its Christmas not easter, the poor retard, but I cherish the thought. It will remain on my door as a symbol of the birth we never shared together...

Thursday, December 15, 2005

What about Wa?

What happened to WA/Nick?

WA's Happenin!?

He deleted his personal live journal. and now there are no witty biting comments from him. has anyone seen him recently? has he been preoccupied with the stuffascope?

WA are you?!

ps nick should change his name to nike. would be much more poingint (how the hell do you spell that?!)

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

DVD! Its a DYNAMITE!!!

Oi Oi Oi Oi!

So i got a dvd playa for my birthday from waweccra.

What a nice gift. One we can all enjoy. I have contemplated moving the dvd and the television into my room, as i do own both. but that would destroy nick. or force him to watch his golden girls dvd in my room during the day, which would in turn leave my room covered in spaff (see post below).

So for now it shall remain in the 'common room'. And i shall rule Bawawecra in a constant state of fear that any moment they could be forced to go back to the OMNI DVD PLAYER!!!!*


*the omni dvd player was a pile of shit that ruined our lives almost everyday. it was the cause of stephs drinking problem, nicks spazzuming asshole and jummys horrible shirts.

The Black Hole.

Somewhere in Nicks room I believe are the following items.

The ends of my jeans
a few of my cds
a towel or two of mine
a few pairs of my jocks
and maybe my long lost red hoodie

and coutless pairs of my socks.

Im not sure if I want them back. Nick was born with a strange form of epilepsy you see. When he masterbates he blacks out and convults wildly. Causing his spaff to go everywhere. and if you believe monica lewinski you cant get spaff out of anything.

Saturday, December 03, 2005

Private Dick Busts BAWAWECRA

Well i guess it had to happen sooner or later. Those of you familiar with the pre-history of Bawawecra would know something of the unsavoury nature of previous tenants. I'd actually forgotten about the horrors we witnessed on that day of our first "viewing" but this morning's events brought it all back.

I answered the door to a serious looking gentleman enquiring after a certain Gxxxx Txxxxxx* whose mail we still get. After me yawning and explaining he doesn't live here anymore i found myself with some kind of Private Investigators badge thrust in my face and a volley of questions about how long I've lived here, who the landlord is, what we do with the ex-tenants mail etc etc

Now more than likely this kid probably just owes $12.86 on his Video Ezy account and that's the end of the story. But I figured I haven't posted in a while and let's face it this is the most exciting thing that has happened in this house since Nick "accidentally" cut up Matt's treasured Levi flares and turned them into hot pants. Now there's a story......




* name supressed

Monday, November 28, 2005

3 Men and a Stuffascope

There is a weird penis thing called a Stuffascope in our house at the moment. Its shaped like a stethoscope but has a penis where the part you put to someones heart beat usually is.

Its a little scary. Apparently you shove it up your lover and you can listen to what their body sounds like from the inside. I dont really want to hear what anyones bowels sound like from far inside them.

But maybe it has its place in Bawawecra. Who am I to judge. If I had as little to do as Steph and Nick during the day I too might start to wonder what sounds I make in all sorts of parts of my body...but the step of buying a device that amplifies it is not one Im sure I would take...

Thursday, November 17, 2005

All My Friends Are Getting Married

Something happened yesterday in Bawawecra...Im not exactly sure what it was. But it was something magical. Maybe Christmas came a little early. Maybe Nick came a little early.

When I arrived home I was dumbfounded by the amazing spotless clean shine of Bawawecra. Nick and Steph stood there grinning from ear to ear in all its glory.

'Who did all this' I asked with surprised enthusiasm.
'LOVE DID IT!' they replied in perfect 5ths.

And what a nice job love did too.

Later that night as they watched movies together I rummaged through some boxes in thier rooms. I came across a marriage certificate, THE MARRIAGE OF STEPH AND NICK!! It was dated yesterday. They have officially tied the knot.

Congratulate them my friends. It is a beautiful day in the house.

I also noted that Nick has not has his period in 4 months (i know this cause he becomes a wingy bitch when he is on the blob), could Nick be up the duff!? He is gettin a lot of odd cravings.

More on this as it happens!!!