Living with Ba.
So apparently a lot of people have been asking the other Bawawecra-ians this question:
"What's it like to live with Matt"
They all use and excitable tone wanting to get a look into my life. You see fans, outside of Bawawecra I am a very important/infamous person. I wont go into it but let me put it this way, If all of Bawawecra died in some freak accident no doubt caused by one of Steph's hairbrianed schemes, Only I would appear on the front cover of the Advertiser. The rest would be back on page 56 or something, right after Andrew Jarmen's 'Kojak impression of the day'.
Anyway, what is it like to live with Matt, you ask? Well I cant answer for the others without sounding like too much of a wanker but I can hazard a guess, Here are some very probable testimonials from the other members of the house:
Steph - "Living with Matt is a dream come true. For years I have admired him from afar wanting to know him. His amazing charm and wit dazzled me and I found myself hanging on his every word. AND NOW I LIVE WITH HIM. I wait patiently for him to get home from work everyday to hear of his latest adventures and run-ins with the 'local pigs', as he refers to them so eloquently. I really don't know what I would do in the house without him. I'D GO NUTS!!!"
Nick - "Id always thought of myself as a bit of a funny guy, you know 'the Joker'. But that was until I lived with Matt. My god I never knew such laughter, I find myself waiting for his comical take on everything knowing that a fantastic spin is coming...But the beautiful thing about Matt is that he also has a sensitive side. I can talk to him about anything and I mean ANYTHING. He always knows exactly what I should do. My life is finally on the right track towards success and well-being"
James - "Normally I would resent a man like Matt, I am used to being the pretty boy, but living with Matt I have had to live in his constant shadow of Beauty. He is like a Sun burning through my comparative Ugliness...I said normally I would hate a man like that, but unfortunately I have a huge man-crush on him. I hang out in the dining room while he showers to catch a glimpse of him in his towel. One time I even busted in on him and he had only just enough time to cover himself with a towel. I tell you I almost died of erections that day. Sometimes he calls me 'Champ' and I quiver. Living with Matt is awesome but Im not sure how long my loins can take it for."
Well there you have it. Those chumps really like me. And I in turn like them too...later Champ.
"What's it like to live with Matt"
They all use and excitable tone wanting to get a look into my life. You see fans, outside of Bawawecra I am a very important/infamous person. I wont go into it but let me put it this way, If all of Bawawecra died in some freak accident no doubt caused by one of Steph's hairbrianed schemes, Only I would appear on the front cover of the Advertiser. The rest would be back on page 56 or something, right after Andrew Jarmen's 'Kojak impression of the day'.
Anyway, what is it like to live with Matt, you ask? Well I cant answer for the others without sounding like too much of a wanker but I can hazard a guess, Here are some very probable testimonials from the other members of the house:
Steph - "Living with Matt is a dream come true. For years I have admired him from afar wanting to know him. His amazing charm and wit dazzled me and I found myself hanging on his every word. AND NOW I LIVE WITH HIM. I wait patiently for him to get home from work everyday to hear of his latest adventures and run-ins with the 'local pigs', as he refers to them so eloquently. I really don't know what I would do in the house without him. I'D GO NUTS!!!"
Nick - "Id always thought of myself as a bit of a funny guy, you know 'the Joker'. But that was until I lived with Matt. My god I never knew such laughter, I find myself waiting for his comical take on everything knowing that a fantastic spin is coming...But the beautiful thing about Matt is that he also has a sensitive side. I can talk to him about anything and I mean ANYTHING. He always knows exactly what I should do. My life is finally on the right track towards success and well-being"
James - "Normally I would resent a man like Matt, I am used to being the pretty boy, but living with Matt I have had to live in his constant shadow of Beauty. He is like a Sun burning through my comparative Ugliness...I said normally I would hate a man like that, but unfortunately I have a huge man-crush on him. I hang out in the dining room while he showers to catch a glimpse of him in his towel. One time I even busted in on him and he had only just enough time to cover himself with a towel. I tell you I almost died of erections that day. Sometimes he calls me 'Champ' and I quiver. Living with Matt is awesome but Im not sure how long my loins can take it for."
Well there you have it. Those chumps really like me. And I in turn like them too...later Champ.
posted by matt at 1:47 pm
7 Comments:
No real comment.... Must be true.
i think this post may leave you open to litigation, matthew.
open to a lynching more like it
dont call me that.
must be working hard today......
as always.
so, is this matt banham....? the one and only matt banham...? where would you register to be on the list of housemates..? / lovas...? if only... when will he notice me?
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